The long and short of it...

Ok, so here is the long and short of my day, my life, my children.
In our home there are six residents and that is not counting the fish and frogs (literally.) There is Mr and Mrs Newkirk, Ms. Whiny, Mr. Wild Man, and Ms. Grumps and Hawthorne (our dog.)
Mr. and Mrs Newkirk reside over Whiny, Wild Man and Grumps with much love yet find that their patience is tested to no end when the three decide to either A. join in all together to put on a firework show of their most annoying and testing flaws, B. set off chain reactions of bad behavior, fleeing the scene of disaster while starting a new set of chaos in another room, or C. quietly taking turns to misbehave resulting in not a moments of peace for either parent to catch their breath.
Ms Whiny is most prone to set the tone with her reaction to Wild Man and her high pitch vocals that produces statement from her mouth to come out in such a manner that it is like nails on the chalk board in your inner ear. The statements them self are not necessarily bad but her timing and pitch sends the blood rushing to your face. For example; we are literally running out the door and she decided in that moment to come to me with a paint and bake tea set, "Mom, you said that we could do this and we haven't and I really want to do it. When can we do it?" Now to any other child you can say, "not now but maybe tomorrow." Not Ms Whiny cause those words might as well be set in stone and you are bound to them. Say a time, an event, or even if you do not and she thought you did then she is the first to hold you to your word. The accumulated time that she has whined about the promises that you broke, things you said or she thought you said and it never happened could add years to anyones life. Now admits Ms. Whine's semi demanding and annoying exterior there lies a very thoughtful and loving girl. She will not permit you to sit down on the couch without coming over for a quick cuddle. While chaos reigns and you feel like you are about to have a heart attack she is always there to say I love you forcing you to pause and appreciate the chaos, cause this is your life full of madness and love.
Mr. Wild Man is not as complicated but gets your heart racing non the less. I have diagnosed him with energy turrets. He can be overcome with an uncontrollable need to display an indescribable amount of energy. Sending his body and vocals into spasms of disastrous chaos. He requires constant activity and if not provided for him then he will seek out his own entertainment and challenges. Most often released by annoying Ms. Whiny setting of the chain reaction. Playing tug-a-war with Hawthorne, with the shirt that he has on, all through out the house. Filling up the tub for his family of otters (helium balloons filled with water) and then running the shower to wash them off, with water all over the floor and the mother screaming he decides then to wrap them in towels and his sleeping bag and put them to bed in his room. Washing the car (while the windows are down) or Ms. Grumps as she stands on the porch watching. The most wondrous aspect of this boy is that no matter the amount of heart ache and head ache that he just put you through when all is said and done he has forgotten all about it and acts as if there was never any water leaking out from under his closed door. Or a hour of you yelling that he has to stay in bed and go to sleep NOW, he will sweetly walk into your room and say, "Good night mom, love you."
Now Ms. Grumps has a huge advantage over the other two due to her age and absolutely heart winning appearance and mannerisms but her grumpiness influences our home just the same. She will follow you around the house just full of the grumps, mumbling her complaints and demands. When you do sit down to settle her she is not happy with that and the grumps take over just the same. The hard thing about the grumps is that they are so very consuming and unrelenting. I would have to say that the most wonderful thing about Ms. Grumps is that she is at that wonderful age of eagerness to show you her new accomplishments. Like throwing the ball and then falling over in laughing hysterics when you kick it back or finding some pennies and spending half an hour playing peek a boo with them and her pocket.
So there it is the long and short of our home, my day, my life, my children.

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